Nothing's gonna change...

Today, as the hours go by, with nothing to do, it was my first time in a long while listening to a particualr song...I use to use it as my alarm song and I would just lay there and listen...Tears would always fall because it was the sweetest song I've ever heard...It was sung to me by the person I treasure so deep, to ask me to be his girlfriend. It's something I'll never forget. I've always wondered why God gave him the plan to sing to me...to convince me to be with him. Why couldn't he just ask me out like normal...?
27th of September was the first time I've ever heard this song.

If I had to live my life without you near me
The days would all be empty
The nights would seem so long
With you I see forever all so clearly
I might have been in love before
But it never felt this strong
Our dreams are young and we both know
They'll take us where we want to go
Hold me now
Touch me now
I don't want to live without you
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
you outta know by now how much I love you
One thing you can be sure of
I'll never ask for more than your love
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You outta know by know how much I love you
The world may change my whole life through
But nothing's gonna change my love for you
If the road ahead is not so easy
Our love will lead the way for us
Just like a guiding star
I'll be there for you if you should need me
You don't have to change a thing
I love you just the way you are
So come with me and share the view
I'll help you see forever too...

I know he meant every word of the lyrics at the time...I wish I could sing it to him one day and find him like how he found me...I clearly still love him but I can't do much at the moment... I still feel as though we were meant to be...but maybe not at this very moment...
This point in my life is so heart wrenching...It is twisted all the time, I would feel happy, then I would be sad, I would miss him, and love him...I don't know how long this is going to last for...
After a week has passed I truely have been happy, never thinking too much of him and enjoying life. But as that time passed, I finally realised that I haven't loved him right and lost the true meaning. Near the end of our relationship I became selfish and hasty and all I wanted to do was to see him. I realised that loving someone is not always just spending time with them and going out, but to take care of them and to sacrifice your needs, also to understand them. I guess I'm not ready, I can't take care of someone but after next year, I would be able to take care of the person I love. I would be free enough to be with them when they're not well, share warmth and to prepare nice meals for them to help them get better. I would've done those things for him if only I could. I would pop by his place before he returns from school or work so I could greet him home and let him rest in my arms. I want to make him laugh and smile when he's down...I would be able to see him whenever he wanted to see me...I really would do my absolute best...

WELL now is not the time to be thinking of these things, better study study study!!EXAMS coming up...
lolzz...smiles!